We are offering them ‘passive’ opportunities and instead of these devices serving them, many children are becoming their slaves, unable to put them down or find something else to do. Please don’t misunderstand me, I am delighted with our modern world with all that is available to us, but I do wonder if we could find more balance and more health for our children by leaving them to play – uninterrupted, undirected and messy.
So many parents I meet will argue that if it was up to them they wouldn’t give their child the latest electronic device but their child nags and says “but I am the ONLY one who doesn’t have…..’ whatever it is. This makes me smile. Can you imagine what we could do if we all made the decision for ourselves based on our own family ethic?
When our daughter was 11 years old she wanted a ipod for Christmas. I decided that however unpopular the decision I was going to hold off for another year and say no to it. Luckily my husband and I were in accord. We had tears and tantrums and many arguments beginning “I am the ONLY one”…. By the time we got close to Christmas our daughter said, “well if I can’t have an ipod I would like some lego..”
In February, whilst my daughter and I were on a long car journey to Yorkshire, we were singing at the top of our voices and laughing. Out of the blue she turned to me and said ‘mum, I love you, and this isn’t easy to say but, I would rather have you as my mum than someone who would have given me an ipod for Christmas’.
My eyes filled to the brim with tears and I couldn’t speak for a moment. It is tough being a mum and I am sure I am making so many mistakes on the way, but I knew that I did what I believed was the very best for my daughter and I stuck to my guns. That was strengthening for me and in that car journey I realised that it was also strengthening for her.