Can we have too many stories?

Oct 8, 2015

I believe that stories are like meals, so whilst sharing stories is thrilling and they feed and nourish us deeply, too many ‘main’ meals can leave us feeling over full. Of course the perfect size ‘meal’ does depend on age of the recipient.

Often, my practice, when working with young children, is that we sing songs and rhymes together before they settle to listen to a story, sometimes with hand puppets, afterwards we enjoy a craft-making activity followed by a time for the children to play and create their own stories. I believe that this is a full meal for small children; a starter; main course and pudding! I have experienced how much the children enjoy themselves and develop their literacy skills as they are receptive and active by turn.

I remember on one occasion visiting a lovely primary school where I’d been invited to share stories with nursery, reception and year one children during the morning.

I arrived early and was in the process of quietly and contentedly setting up my puppet story, in the hall, when one of the teachers asked me if it would be alright for her to bring the children in early, as they were arriving in dribs and drabs. Before I spoke she assured me that they would be at the other end of the hall, facing the other way, and wouldn’t disturb my prep at all. It wasn’t a problem for me, although I explained that I prefer to set up before the young children arrive so that there is a moment of magical anticipation before the puppets are revealed.

The teacher led a group of nursery children into the hall, sitting them in front of a TV which had been hidden behind curtains, they sat transfixed and watched.

As I continued to prepare, my session less than 20 minutes away, I wondered to myself how I could possibly compete with the Disney Channel? I also observed teachers reprimanding children for moving or chatting to their neighbour as several of the adults conducted their own loud and distracting conversations across and around them. They told the children that they were ‘disturbing the lady who was going to tell stories’, shaming them into silence.

I reflected on how often this happens to our tiny children, both the double standards of what is acceptable behaviour for them in contrast to that which is being modelled by the adults and what I call the ‘easy option’ of switching the TV on instead of letting children interact with each other in natural play or actively engaging with them. I wondered if this ‘passive entertainment’ was really the best option for four year olds at the beginning of their school day.

I found myself getting angry inside and knew that this wasn’t a great way for me to begin, but I was conflicted about my role in this situation, whether I should interfere immediately, speak to staff at the end of the morning or remain silent. Was this any of my business?

When I signalled my readiness to the staff they immediately switched the TV off, mid film, before ushering the children over to me to ‘watch more’. It was their second main meal of the morning and it wasn’t even 9.30am!

I began to sing, calming myself as best I could and as I lit the candle the children, teachers and I sank deeply into the story. We experienced a beautiful 30 minutes together, but I could sense that the children were ‘full’, ready to move around and engage with their friends. I didn’t push my luck and concluded the session promptly.

Other classes followed and we had fun together, they were able to sit for longer, enjoy a craft activity and create their own stories too. I wondered what experience they had had before the story.

I did decide to speak with the teachers at the end of the morning, we had an open and honest discussion and most of them agreed with me saying that they had never considered this before. One teacher said that it had moved her deeply and felt that it would change her teaching.

I have also experienced times when I have concluded a morning or afternoon storytelling session only to find that the teacher immediately gets a book out to read to the children, as their parents come to collect them or they wait for their lunch.

Sometimes teachers launch straight into questions with the children, asking them which is their favourite part of the story or session. This means that the story is being analysed and brought up into the thinking realms before it has had a chance to work its way magically into the heart and soul of the child.

As the author Ben Okri says
‘It is easy to forget how mysterious and mighty stories are. They do their work in silence, invisibly. They work with the internal materials of the mind and self. They become part of you while changing you.‘  

After many such experiences, I have decided on balance it’s better for me to speak to teachers in advance of each session, offering my opinions, suggesting that instead of reading stories before or after my sessions or asking questions (until, if possible, the following day) the children have a moment of free play. Without exception the teachers have welcomed these ideas and agreed to experiment with my ideas, often reporting back to me about the positive results.

We all benefit from balanced meals which might at times include a starter and/or pudding…. We could even have a couple of large meals in a day, but I would urge you to consider that too many meals, too many stories, serves no positive purpose at all. I believe we would benefit instead from the time and space to wonder, imagine and dream after that well told and magical story.

What are your thoughts and experiences? Do you read lots and lots of books to your children at bedtime or just feast on one? I’d love to hear your story either here or via twitter @danyahmiller…..